Refried Screens

It had to happen.

Every major do-gooder has a nemisis.

Shazam has Black Adam.

Grey’s Anatomy has Isaiah Washington.

 

Now we’ve learned that Barack Obama has Cousin Pookie.

No one knows what Pookie looks like. My assumption is he must be modeled after Pookie from New Jack City.

The question on a lot of people’s minds is, ‘why does it have to be a brotha?’ And if he has to be a brotha, why not make him a “magic negro” like J.C. from the Green Mile?

David Ehrenstein believes it’s because Obama is the magic negro himself, but I don’t believe it. If a “magic negro” exists, it’s Will Smith, because only magic can make a piece of crap like ‘Getting Jiggy With It’ a #1 song and a dud like ‘I, Robot’ a hit movie.

But I digress…

Having an “evil Negro” was successfully employed by George Bush in the 1988 election and Bill Clinton coined the phrase Sister Souljah moment by using a black rapper as his nemesis.

Even Santa Claus has an evil Negro (Zwarte ‘Black’ Piet) to further his political agenda.

At times like these, if you can’t trust Santa, who can you trust?

We need a true hero.

An icon above all icons.

Superman.

Surely he is immune to having an evil negro. He had Lex Luthor. Bald whiteboy. Why can’t Obama be like Superman?

Wait a minute. Who’s that guy underneath Lex Luthor?

That’s right.

It’s Bizarro, Supeman’s exact opposite, who was backwards and did everything wrong.

Bizarro spoke in ebonics…

Bizarro, like Undercover Brother, had a weakness for “Black Man’s Kryptonite” AKA the “White She-Devil”…

Bizarro isn’t really white after all.

He’s just lightskinded.

I guess Obama is more like Superman than I thought…——-

So, now that Obama has his Cousin Pookie, what are the other candidates going to do? Is everyone going to pick an “evil negro” or will other ethnicities be empoyed? Who are your top candidates for Hilary, Rudy, McCain or Edwards nemesis?

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